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Why are some people so good at making money while others are not? What does it take to change that? In this interview, we talk with Barbara Stanny who is an expert in the field of financial wealth creation. She’s an author and expert who has dedicated her life to helping people like you win financially.
Learn more about Barbara and her work at > www.barbara-huson.com
We also recommend:
- Wei Houng: Creating The Right Money Mindset
- Adam & Amy: How to Take a Stand with Your Brand and Not Lose Sales
- Cory Ames: Carving Out Your Own Path and Getting Traction with Smart Marketing
Transcription of Interview
(Transcribed by Otter.ai, there may be errors)
Adam G. Force 00:03
Welcome to the Change Creator podcast where entrepreneurs come to learn how to live their truth, get rich and make a massive difference in the world. I’m your host, Adam forest co founder, Change Creator and co creator of the captivate method. Each week we talk to experts about leadership, digital marketing and sales strategies that you can implement in your business and life to go big, visit us at Change Creator comm forward slash go big to grab awesome resources that will help drive your business forward. All right, what’s going on everybody? Welcome back to the Change Creator podcast show. This is your host, Adam force. If you missed the last episode, definitely go back and check it out. We had a great conversation with Brendan Cain. It’s all about getting your customers attention in three seconds or less. He’s worked with people like Taylor Swift and other really great organizations like the NHL and things like that. He’s very good at what he does. And it ties into a lot of what we do here, when it comes to storytelling, once you capture that attention, and you’re building up that momentum, so valuable, valuable insights there. Alright, so go back. That’s what Brendan Kane. This week, we’re going to be talking to best selling author. She’s a wealth coach, inspirational speaker, she has a lot of workshops. And her name is Barbara stanny. All right, so she’s an authority, and she works a lot with women. And she focuses on wealth, that’s her primary thing. So, you know, Barbara is on a mission, essentially, to really inspire women to become financially empowered, right. So her presentations, and her key message is really, that when you take charge of your money, you take control of your life. And she tries to make this simple for people to realize and harness that power. So we’re gonna really be talking about money mindset, and all the different elements that come into play when it comes to your own success. All right, so very, very valuable conversation. I’m excited about it, I think you guys are gonna get a lot from Barbara, we’re going to talk about her latest book as well, which is going to offer a tons of great insights. So if you guys aren’t following us on Facebook, make sure you stop by to follow Change Creator on Facebook, we do a lot of posts there. We have lots of conversations there. And if you want to take it further, join us in be a Change Creator. That’s our Facebook group. And we do a lot of stuff over there. Okay. All right, guys. Don’t forget we did update. If you go to change kit, comm forward slash go big. We did update date that with a new training on authentic brand storytelling, it’s with myself that I go through some really key insights there. So stop by Change creator.com forward slash go big, and that free training will be available to you there. Okay. Alright, so without further ado, let’s dive into this conversation with Barbara. Okay, show me the heat. Hey, Barbara, welcome to the Change Creator podcast How you doing today?
Barbara Stanny 03:04
I’m doing great, Adam. Thank you.
Adam G. Force 03:07
Excellent. I appreciate you taking the time to be here. As I’ve mentioned, too, I love talking about mindset, wealth, all those good things. And you made an interesting comment about that there’s a difference between wealth and profits. And we’ll get into that in a little bit. Now, I know you have a new book coming out rewire for wealth. And so let’s let’s take a few steps back before that book and how you got into this whole category of focusing on wealth, creation and mindset and things like that helping women. What was the path there? Like what happened in your life? Can you take us there?
Barbara Stanny 03:46
Yeah, if anyone told me that this, I wouldn’t be writing eight books on money. I would have told them they were crazy. I grew up in a wealthy family. My father was the heir of h&r block. And the only advice he ever gave me about money was Don’t worry, don’t worry. I thought that was great advice. I didn’t understand money. I just wanted to spend it. And of course, under that those words was the assumption they’ll always be a man to take care of you and there always was. And I married a man who was a stockbroker and a certified financial planner. So he was perfect. But what I found out very early in our marriage is that he was a compulsive gambler. And over the course of our 15 year marriage, I continued to let him manage the money, even though I knew he was gambling in a way. That’s how terrified I was and intimidated by anything to do with money. Finally, after 15 years, I got a divorce. And I decided money’s not my thing. I don’t want to deal with money. Well, I have this theory that if you don’t deal with your money, you Money will deal with you. And in the next year after my divorce, I got tax bills for over way over a million dollars, almost 2 million for back taxes. He didn’t pay for illegal deals he got us in. And, of course, my signature was on everything. And my ex had left the country, I didn’t have anywhere close to a million dollars. And my father wouldn’t lend me the money. And that’s when I knew I had to get smart. I had three, three daughters. One was just a baby, I was not going to raise those girls on the street. But every time I go to try to figure out my finances, trying to understand money, my eyes would glaze over, my brain would fog up. I was I was really at a loss, I was really at my wit’s end. But I have this theory, that if you that when you make a commitment, like a down to your earth, down to your toes commitment, the universe revolves to help you reach your goal. And I was writing for this, I was a journalist writing for the San Francisco Business Times. And I got hired for a freelance writing project, to interview women who are smart with money. And those interviews changed my life. I not only got smart about money, but I wrote my first book, Prince Charming is incoming how women get smart about money. And suddenly I had this whole new career, and I was traveling all over the country doing financial education for women, but I couldn’t make money. So I decided to interview women who made lots of money. And I started making six figures, three, four times what I’d ever made, before I even finished writing my next book, secrets of six figure women. And then I was trying, then I decided to see if I could teach others what I was learning. And I started giving overcoming under earning workshops. And that became my next book. And then my next book was called sacred success. And now my latest one coming out rewire for wealth. So it was a journey I never expected to take.
Adam G. Force 06:57
Interesting. So what was the shift that took place that, you know, you said you interviewed some women of wealth. And then you started making your six figures and beyond? What started changing?
Barbara Stanny 07:12
I think the biggest thing it was with my first book, when I was interviewing women who are financially savvy, and I’ve seen this all the way through, it wasn’t what they did. It was how they thought. And when I shifted my thinking, that’s when everything changed. Yeah, and I see, I just see that across the board. It’s it’s not the behavior, it’s the cause of that behavior.
Adam G. Force 07:40
I want to go a little deeper there, because I think it’s so important because a lot of times we hear whether it’s about being an entrepreneur, you’re gonna hear, oh, it’s 80% mindset, right? It’s you got to go from the employee mindset to the entrepreneur mindset to be a successful entrepreneur, you got to think a certain way. Oh, to be wealthy. It’s about mindset. It’s like most of life and how we are crafting our futures and who we are as people and the things we have, it comes down to how we think and how it dictates the decisions that we make. So I’m curious on, I mean, are there any just examples of like, how does your mindset have to shift? And what were the changes in your life that you started noticing? because of certain shifts? Or did you have to do things like affirmations? Like what steps did you have to take to really start making these shifts?
Barbara Stanny 08:35
So I’m going to tell you what I did , but it took me a long time. I think the biggest thing, and then I’m going to tell you where I am now with that, because it’s shift, it’s changed. So I think one of the biggest things was, and you may not, this may not connect with you as a man. But I, but so many women have this rescue fantasy that someone Prince Charming is going to come along and save them. And one of the biggest things I learned from interviewing these women, one of the first things, no one got smart while harboring a rescue fantasy. It’s like, it’s like driving a car with water down gas, you’re just not going to get very far right. And when I when I saw all these women, they came to a point where they said, no one’s going to do this for me. No one’s going to do this for me, I need to do it myself. And when I realize No one’s going to save me and Prince Charming doesn’t need to be a man or or a, you know, Princess charming. Prince Charming could be anything you think is going to rescue. It could be the government, it could be an inheritance. It could be just this amorphous something that when you give up the rescue fantasy when you get, you know, or the lottery when you give it up, that’s when you start shifting between that time and the time that I really, really became financially successful, it took a long time. And what I began to realize about six years ago, that shifting your thinking isn’t enough that our behavior, everything we do, every single thing we do, whether it’s inhaling and exhaling, saving and spending, building a business. It’s controlled by our brain. Yeah, it’s controlled by our brain, but our brain is controlled by our thoughts. Yeah. And so when you understand how the brain and the mind work together, you can so speed up your learning is phenomenal. So I don’t know, if you want me to go into that. Or if you had something else you wanted to talk
Adam G. Force 10:49
No. I mean, I like the flow. I think that just getting that sense. I mean, that’s a good example of a shift for people, like, you know, for some women, it might be this limiting belief that someone else is going to take care of them because of historical cultural stigmas and, you know, ideas, but that’s not the case. That’s not how life works. So that’s a major shift example. And I think, you know, as we all grow up, right, it’s like, we have these types of limiting beliefs, whether we’re aware of them or not, but it’s like how we’re programmed, right? And so I guess I’m curious, if you don’t know that your feeling is, hey, someone’s going to save me? Like, if you don’t know about that, how do you start uncovering those beliefs that are holding you back?
Barbara Stanny 11:43
Okay, that’s a really good question. Because most of us don’t know, most of us don’t know, I still get to the point where I’m seeing I’m stuck somewhere, and I don’t know. And the key, the key, the place to start looking, is wherever you’re unhappy, wherever you’re unhappy, is probably where you’re giving your power away. And the key, the place to start, is what I call the power question. And that’s asking yourself, what do I want. So if your business isn’t succeeding at the level you want, if you’re not bringing in the income you want, if you’re not attracting the right, clients you want and, and you’re not feeling good about it, the questions get really clear on what you want. And then to look at what may be getting in that way of that, right. And sometimes it may be a belief, but other times, and usually everything goes down for a belief, but but you think, all beliefs, all beliefs come from at the core of all beliefs come from early decisions you made, right decisions you made about yourself, in the world you made about money you made about how it works. And those decisions were programmed in us by by the world by our families, vibrant culture, by our schools by the church. And so the more you can go in and ask yourself, What am I afraid of? What is this telling me? What is what do I What do I need to know what would happen if I did have all the money I wanted all the clients I wanted? And that often brings up our fears?
Adam G. Force 13:35
Hmm. That’s an interesting way to think about it. Because I think part of it is really, you know, and everybody learns differently, right, Barbara? So it’s like, you know, sometimes you can read a book or two on a topic, and you’re like, Okay, and you kind of get it. And then you read a third book on the same topic, but the way that person explains the ideas is different. And it registers with you. You’re like, Oh, I thought I got it. Now. I really get it. You ever have that experience?
Barbara Stanny 14:02
But sometimes it took those three books before
Adam G. Force 14:05
Barbara Stanny 14:07
You know, to pave the way
Adam G. Force 14:09
There you go. It’s part of the process. Yeah.
Barbara Stanny 14:12
So yeah, everything’s a process. You don’t just go in a straight line that you want. Sustained change.
Adam G. Force 14:18
Right. Right. That’s interesting now, but go ahead.
Barbara Stanny 14:22
Yes. To answer your question. Yeah. Sometimes it just clicks. It just clicks. Yeah. But it takes a while.
Adam G. Force 14:33
That’s the thing, you can start acknowledging some of those limiting beliefs and you can start trying to shift the way you think about things. One thing that I’ve learned and this is always a challenge, and it still is, you know, just being honest, it’s like well, I think that breaking because it’s easy to consciously tell yourself things all day long, but that’s kind of like in my mind, trying to tell The record player to change the record without actually going in there and like reprogramming what’s actually playing? Right?
Barbara Stanny 15:08
You know what’s actually playing the brain. It’s your brains wiring, right? So we think just changing our thinking a little bit is going to change our brains wiring. Ah, that’s it. And it’s understanding how to rewire your brain. And it takes a period of time, anywhere from three weeks on to really make the change and sustain the change.
Adam G. Force 15:40
Yeah, yeah. And do you think that these changes for people to take those steps and actually sustain it is a very uncomfortable process. It’s kind of like trying to pick a new habit up. And it’s just like, one of those things that you keep falling off the wagon and back into your old unconscious habits?
Barbara Stanny 15:59
Well, first, I can say some, I can say several things about that. But yeah, the number one requirement for going to the next level, in anything in anything, whether it’s making more money or losing more weight, the number one requirement is the willingness to be uncomfortable. Yeah. So, um, discomfort is a sign that you are moving in the right direction, right? Because all success, all of it is always found just outside your comfort zone. You know, I ask ironers When’s the last time you did something you thought you couldn’t do? Or we’re scared to do? And they scratch their head? And they say, Oh, I don’t know. I ask hires that same question. And they laugh. And they say all the time. It’s just a way of life. In fact, I have what I’ve labeled the higher earner slogan that when anything comes their way. They just ate whether they understand or they believe they can do it or not. They just say it was not illegal or immoral. I just say yes.
Adam G. Force 17:03
Yeah, and just go for it. Yeah, I like that, too.
Barbara Stanny 17:07
And the reason, the reason we are experiencing discomfort is because our brains been wired, it’s been deeply embedded. To do things the same way over and over again. You know, who was it? The wealthy industrial said, wealth is a matter of habit. And it’s so true. You want to create wealth, or success or whatever, you change your habits. But changing your habits means reprogramming your brain. And the way you’re going against the brain’s wiring is like going against gravity. Yeah, it’s like everything will just suck you in. Yeah.
Adam G. Force 17:49
That’s a good way to put it.
Barbara Stanny 17:50
Yes. So it takes Yes, you may say you slip back. But by over repeating, and I have a process that I created to help you rewire your brain so that when you when you slip back, you know exactly what you need to do next.
Adam G. Force 18:10
Okay. And that’s in rewire for for health. Your book
Barbara Stanny 18:15
It’s actually called rewire for wealth.
Adam G. Force 18:17
I’m sorry, oh my God, I can’t read.
Barbara Stanny 18:19
But it’s rewire for health too. It’s perfect.
Adam G. Force 18:23
Yeah. Wealth and health. Yes. rewire for health. So these are steps that you outline in the book, correct?
Barbara Stanny 18:31
Yeah, yes. Yes.
Adam G. Force 18:33
Barbara Stanny 18:34
Yeah, I’m just assessing how the whole process works, the steps you can take, and then how to make sure you stay on track.
Adam G. Force 18:43
Yeah, I mean, I think a lot of people want to know that stuff that, you know, so anybody listening, that’s why I wanted to bring it up. So these are things that we’ll go deeper in. Maybe you can give us just a little example. An idea of like, okay, so I got to rewire her, I got to acknowledge where my issues are. We kind of touched on some of the like, how we start narrowing that down a little bit. But now I need to actually reprogram the way I think and obviously there’s there’s habits that have to be made here and changes. So can you give an example of just, you know, a small taste of what’s in the book about, you know, how that starts that process?
Barbara Stanny 19:20
I would love to let me just give you some background. Yeah, sure. I’ve been working with women, helping them become financially savvy, some financially responsible, cre Well, for 20 years. And then about five or six years ago, I got this feeling. It’s just feeling in just this feeling that something was missing in my work. And I worked with thousands and thousands of women, and they couldn’t figure out what’s going and it got to the point where I was losing interest in my work, right. And I couldn’t understand it. And so I can’t I took a break. And I think, okay, if anything’s missing, I said, my little prayer, if anything’s missing, show me. And I was, I was, I was on my computer, and I was looking at my email. And this article about neuroscience shows up in my inbox, and I start reading it. And it’s like, these lights went off in my brain, I can imagine like, like, like a slot machine. And it’s that you found it and found the missing piece. And the more I studied neuroscience, the more I saw how this was missing in our discussion about changing our financial changing our habits, period, right. And what I learned is the the mind and the brain work together. And the brain is a physical organ in our skull, right. And it works on electrical chemical impulses. The mind is not an organ, it is a non physical, intangible entity that is a source of our thoughts and feelings, right. And the every time you have a thought, or you feel a feeling, it sends electrical, these electrical chemical signals in the brain, which either connect with an existing neural pathway or start building a new one. Okay. So if you want to create a new habit, you have to look at the thoughts that were contributing to the old habit and change those thoughts. But then you have to understand the process of wiring your brain. So it took me it took me a while It took me a long while I did a lot of experimentation, I did a lot of retreats I did a lot of work with, with with my wonderful clients who became my my willing guinea pigs figure out a very simple but very, very, it’s not easy process. It’s a three step process, to train your mind, to rewire your brain for wealth, and well being. And because wealth without well being is not the purpose, not the purpose of my work, right? You want you want both. And so let’s say you always have a thought, there’s never enough, there’s never enough. Or you may have a thought, I’m not enough, I can’t do this. I’m not enough, whatever it is. And you may have learned that your parents may have said that you may have learned that from your teachers at school, whatever that thought, sends those electrical chemical impulses in your brain that they’re like little shovels that keep digging a neural pathway, they dig a ditch deeper and deeper and deeper until it becomes a hard wired habit. Yeah, so that anything you do, you will start doing things unconsciously, to get what’s called confirmation bias, because the brain always confirms your beliefs. So you start doing things unconsciously, that will show you there’s never enough that will make sure there’s never enough that will prove you’re not enough. So how do you change that you change your thinking, but just to change, your thinking is not enough. Because willpower will not do it? It won’t. And so the I’ll tell you the three steps, and then I will explain them briefly. And then we could go into a deeper if you’d like. Okay?
Adam G. Force 23:40
Barbara Stanny 23:41
So the three steps are recognize, reframe, and respond differently. And this is a very important process. Okay. So the first is, oh, I’m Have you it’s recognize a thought or, and having a thought, there’s never enough. You walk into a store and you want to buy something, and you think there’s never enough? I can’t do that. So you just recognize the thought, Oh, isn’t that interesting? I’m having a thought about not being there’s never enough. And what that does, it separates you from the thought. Because the thought is not truth. It’s just a thought that has been programmed in your brain that has been influenced from some outside source. So you say you recognize that you observe it like a like a, like a bystander like like an out of body. Oh, I’m having a thought about there’s never enough, but you do it not with judgment. You do it with curiosity. Oh, isn’t that interesting? And then after you’ve observed it, the second thing is to reframe it. How can I see it differently? How can I see it differently to put look at it in another way and it could Be, no matter what happens, they’ll be enough. That’s one way. Or it could be, oh, this is a good opportunity to rewire. But find some way to reframe that situation instead of going into that downward spiral of not enough. Or I will find a way to make sure there’s enough. Because when you reframe, and you replace that thought with another one, it sends your Neo your frontal cortex into looking for strategies to create that. But anyway, you recognize you reframe, and then you respond differently. you respond differently than you normally would. Yeah, you do what don’t doesn’t feel comfortable, do what doesn’t feel like yourself. And you do that over and over and over and over again, because repetition is the key, and you will start noticing that your world changes, right. Was that clear?
Adam G. Force 26:03
Yeah. No, I mean, I think it makes sense. And this is the challenging part. Because, you know, it’s like, you know, you catch yourself, you know, my wife, and I do this where we’ll say something like, Man, you know, always something this or that. And he like, catch yourself saying these things. And then, you know, I realized, you know, I’ve read a handful of books about the unconscious mind all these things. And I’m like, that, even if you’re saying it to someone else, or you’re saying it about your own situation in the moment, you are still carving those pathways in your mind to continue to replicate that scenario for yourself. Right?
Barbara Stanny 26:42
Exactly. Exactly. And our words are so powerful, that people don’t realize how powerful our words are. So if you do nothing else, just be hyper vigilant about the words you use, just like what you just said. And when you catch yourself using seeing things that you don’t want to create, in your reality, even if it’s you’re just talking about someone else, you stop. And yeah, I’ll even go Stop that, Barbara. Stop that.
Adam G. Force 27:15
Yeah, yeah. And I remember, I’m sure you’re familiar with like T.Harv Eker’s book, the secrets of the Millionaire Mind. That was one of the first books I’ve read about money mindset years ago. And he would always say, like, when you catch yourself, like blaming justifying something like, you know, all these negative things, to like, literally take your finger and run it across your throat, because you’re cutting out your financial, you know, potential. And I always found it to be so weird, but he was creating just like you said, Tell yourself like, stop, like, you have to create almost like this physical reaction to shut it off.
Barbara Stanny 27:53
Exactly, exactly. And you have to do it again. And again. But here’s the thing, you don’t do it from a place of anger or judgment. Because even though you’re slicing your throat, yeah, if you do that, you know yet dumb idiot. What you’re doing is just reinforcing another opposing negative belief that will make changing that belief harder, right? So, and it’s not see what I want to get away with is thinking it’s just mindset. Okay, that it is also the mind brain connection. Right? Because if you shift your mindset without understanding how the brain works, it was it’s too easy to fall back into old ways.
Adam G. Force 28:44
Yeah, definitely. Wow. So I always found this stuff to be such a, I found it to be a lot to take in and course correct. And, you know, it helps to have mentors and things like that. And, you know, I’ve tried affirmations and all these things, and I recognize certain things about money mindset for myself for years. But I always found it very challenging to overcome and course correct, I really, I just, it’s one of those things, no matter how aware I am of finding a way to really stick to a routine that creates these new habits creates a new way of being. Personally I find it very challenging.
Barbara Stanny 29:26
You know, it’s interesting about affirmations. I’m going to talk about the law of attraction, right? That the way you think and just just focus on the positive and, and just everything will come to you But what they don’t talk about is the law of congruence. And the law here is that you get what you want, not what you asked for. So if you say I want money, I want lots of money. But if what you really want is to stay safe Or to be liked. And you think wealthy people aren’t likable, or they’re greedy, or they’re bad, right, then money isn’t what you really want. And so it’s really important that if you’re, if you know what you want, buy what you have, that shows you what you want. Okay? And if you don’t have what you say you want, then it’s because a party doesn’t really want it. And that’s where it’ll look what part of me doesn’t want it.
Adam G. Force 30:31
Man. Yeah, I mean, and do we go see a psychologist to work that out?
Barbara Stanny 30:37
Not necessarily No, not. Yeah, I mean, believe me, I’ve seen many psychologists to work many of this stuff out. But honestly, sometimes simply talking about it. Right, I do a lot of journaling. And I asked myself, if you ask yourself the right questions like, why don’t I want it will happen by habit? What would happen? If nothing changed in five years? What would happen if everything changed in five years? Yeah. You look at what comes up for you. All the answers are there. And if you tell yourself It’s hard enough times, your brain will not let you ask excavate the truth.
Adam G. Force 31:19
Yeah. I like the idea of asking the right questions. This has been something I’ve really been investigating a lot, just as an entrepreneur in general, let alone for financial wealth and growth and stuff. But just in general, like asking the right question, because asking the wrong questions can lead you to just an ongoing whirlwind of challenges that never gets you anywhere. And I realized, as I’ve grown in my second business, how important it really is to ask the right questions in order to make real progress.
Barbara Stanny 31:57
Oh, that’s so good. It’s important to ask the right questions. And the second part of that is to be brutally honest in answering them.
Adam G. Force 32:06
Yes, I like that. That’s, that’s, it’s so true. And most people they want to, they know what they should say, because that’s the right thing. And so it’s like, it’s like these surveys, you know, we started years ago with the business, we were going after social entrepreneurs, because all this data out there and you know, I had personal interest in it. And then all the data said, Everybody wants to put their they’ll spend more on sustainable products, organic, they want to do better in the world, they want to be a conscious shopper. But that that survey data is what everyone would like to be. And then the hard data of sales and all that stuff. It never reflected it. So it’s like, here’s when it comes down to putting money on the table, what really happens. And I think a lot of times we like to tell ourselves what we know and would like to be. And then that’s it. You know what I mean? So being honest with yourself, it is very important.
Barbara Stanny 33:00
Yeah, and sometimes it’s hard. We spent so many years covering up the truth I’ll never forget, like when I was when I was going through all my money crap, when my life was falling apart, and I go to the bank, and I put my card in and they would say sorry, no money. And I was terrified, terrified. But I couldn’t get smart. I couldn’t I couldn’t read. I couldn’t. I couldn’t go to class I couldn’t understand. So I went to therapy. And I remember saying to the therapist, oh, Daniel, I really want to understand money. I really do. You got to help me, I really do. And the therapist looked back at me, looked me straight in the eyes. And I said, Daniel, I really want to get smart. And he said, No, you don’t. And it was like a part of me. It was like, I couldn’t respond. I couldn’t argue. It was like, there was a part of me that didn’t Hmm. And it was only when I explored the that part of me that was afraid that if I got smart and I took charge of my money, I’d lose everything. Or that my parents would be furious because they didn’t think women should manage money. Or I thought a man wouldn’t love me if I was financially successful. All these things that were in my head that I didn’t even know.
Adam G. Force 34:22
Yeah, wow. This is part of that discovery process. And it’s it’s tough because you always feel like this is for people listening. I know what it’s like when you keep doing things, something doesn’t work out. And then you’re going to try to work on your your mindset like through these processes, like you’re outlining and things like that. You always feel like you’re going back to square one. You’re going back to start or something new again and you’re not like you know any mean you’re not like getting deep in it making that progress, like you feel like you’re always starting over
Barbara Stanny 34:53
Then that is a lack of that…The one cause of that is lazy thinking and a lack of discipline. It’s so much easier, it’s so much easier to take the path of least resistance, which is the way your brain is wired. It’s so easy to go back to, oh, there’s just never enough are all the I hate wealthy people, they’re so greedy. It’s so easy. It takes a terrific amount of discipline to continually say, when you hear yourself saying, Oh, this is so hard. No, it’s not hard. It’s challenging. And I’m up for the challenge. Yeah, if you can just notice yourself, recognize yourself saying it’s so hard and reframe it and saying, it’s challenging. And I’m up for the challenge.
Adam G. Force 35:40
Barbara Stanny 35:42
I just last week, okay, just last week, my team and I decided we were gonna, I was gonna, we were gonna do this project. And of course, I had to create the project. And I’d never done this project before. And I have this, this thing that it’s, it’s so old, but it keeps sneaking up because the old wiring never completely disappears. And I started to do this work on this project. And as part of me says, I don’t have what it takes. I don’t have what it takes. And I started to like panic. And I said, Wait a minute. This is an old wiring. I don’t have what it takes. And I think this is going to be so hard. Because I don’t have what it takes, right. And I said, Stop. How can I? I see that as an old? I recognize that as an old programming, an old thought. But that’s just a thought. It’s just a thought that’s been wired in, I know where it came from. So how can I reframe it? How can I see it differently? And I tried, I have what it takes. But then I thought no, I thought I can handle this. Whatever it is, I can handle this. And I have it I’m looking at my post it note, I wrote down, I can handle this. And then I started responding differently. Writing the the script, I thought I didn’t know how to write but writing it anyway, which I didn’t want to do. And I could have easily not done but I did it anyway. Right? And eventually, when you we will recognize and then reframe it to I can handle this and then do what you don’t want to do. It starts to get easier and easier.
Adam G. Force 37:19
Yeah. I love that. And yeah, it’s it is just, I’m excited to you know, read your book and stuff. I want to be respectful of your time. And I think that these processes are so important for us to understand, I mean, first thing to do is understand what’s going on with yourself, right? Like I always like to tell entrepreneurs like you have to get oriented. If you want to get to point B get oriented on where exactly point A is, and it comes down to that point you made the honesty part of where you really are with yourself and the business and things like that. So just getting oriented and then being willing to take the steps now that are necessary, and be disciplined doing it right.
Barbara Stanny 38:04
Exactly. Be disciplined, but be disciplined, not out of a place of punishing yourself, you know, you idiot keep going do that. But out of Oh, this will help me be a better steward of my money. This will help me make a difference in the world. This will help me serve more people. If I can rewire if I can. If I can. If I can make it easy for me. I will be able to serve more.
Adam G. Force 38:32
Yeah, exactly. Exactly. It’s a good note to to wrap up on here Barbara. Let everybody know like where do they learn more about you your book when it’s coming out all that kind of stuff. Can you just give us a little bit for people listen
Barbara Stanny 38:46
Sure thank you, my I on my website. Great place to go is Barbara-houson.com. And my book is up for sale. Now. It’s pre sale, and it’s hits the shelves on January 12.
Adam G. Force 39:08
Exciting, very cool. Barbara really appreciate you taking the time to talk about all these great insights that you have and I look forward to reading your book.
Barbara Stanny 39:18
And thank you so much for having me on your show. I really enjoyed talking to you. I like how honest you are.
Adam G. Force 39:24
I did my best. Okay, take care Barbara.
Barbara Stanny 39:29
Adam G. Force 39:29
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